Day 31: Binge This!

My therapist gave me advise I thought was catered to me!

When my sister and I were together my sister said she was worried about my binge drinking.

I remember in college I had a bottle of everclear in my bar and my sister told my mom I was an alcoholic.  I laughed and questioned that.

I've only drank by myself three times.  Once I got totally plastered and the other two were a half a glass of wine.

I am a social person.  I like social cleaning, social activities and social drinking.  I don't like it when there is no one there to see what foolish things you do.  Who will remember, and who will say "I remember when you were drunk and kissed that . . . "

I have a bar, wine rack, beer fridge.  I never use it by myself.  Sometimes I don't even use it with other people.  I had fun in college.  I found my great moments using a bottle of booze.  Even as I get older I sometimes prefer to not drink.

I love being drunk.  The spinning feeling, everyone so silly, the wit rolls of my tongue.  I can play pool and do a headstand.   I have a better performance with piano and find myself comfortable.  Is it the alcohol?  Only in part.  I'd say the alcohol is about 31% of the experience while my friends are the rest of that percentage.  (Roughly 69% in case you didn't do the math!)

With that said, drinking isn't always fun.  When you are with a bunch of boring antisocial business persons, when you barely know people and they seem crazy when drunk, when you have friends that can't talk about anything but all other 5 times this week they were drunk, I want to look at these people and say why am I wasting my alcohol time on you?  Yes alcohol time.

Alcohol time is the time you spend drinking.  I think there is a balance of alcohol time per month.  If you exceed it then you are really cool or an alcoholic who is self-conscious, can't control your intake (and outtake) and should get great health insurance so the hospital visits aren't so expensive.   If you don't use it up then you are a prude, Mormon, AA member or are really cool and training for a race (but still find ways to appreciate a sip).  There are that don't drink for medical reasons or by choice.  I don't really see anything wrong with that as long as they can be fun, entertaining and slam their friends down with wit and sarcasm.

So back to me. 

I am at my therapy session and I tell my therapist that I was in a marching band, I have all this booze at my house but never use it.  I drink with friends and if I binge drink it's because we started early in the day, we have meals, we drink water, we have dd's, we have support, friends and a way to be healthy.  Sure it's more than three drinks, but in a half of a day time span!  Sure it happens on occasion, but not every week from Thursday - Sunday like every good gay man.

My therapist told me that "alcohol does lower your immune system and you could catch a cold.  Alcohol can promote depression.  Alcohol can be bad.  BUT.  Don't sacrifice your health for happiness.  Meaning, if you are going to get together and have a weekend of eating, drinking, and being happy.  If you want to drink then drink.  Don't feel you need to stop completely so that you drop a level of happiness.  As long as you are taking care of yourself, being responsible, exercising, eating right, and making sure your all around health is good then do it."

Did she just tell me to binge drink?  I think she did!

We all have some unhealthy habit or obsession.  We indulge in something.  Treat yourself well and it's alright to do it in moderation.  Break moderation and indulge yourself and two things happen.  We lose sight of our own health and we no longer enjoy the activity for reasons of happiness.

With that I have chosen to binge drink on my birthday, birthday's of friends, every band occasion, weddings, funerals, brisks, regular working hours, concerts, rehearsals, performances, bathroom time, doctor's appointments, exercise, movies, restaurants and sleep  I will try to limit drinking during teeth brushing although I will use a mouthwash high in alcohol content.